Suffering instead of pleasure – Causes of painful sex

Many women experience pain during sexual intercourse. Lack of proper vaginal wetting, relationship problems, or gynecological problems can also be a background.

Painful intercourse, in Greek medical terms, dyspareunia (pareunos: lying with someone) is a manifestation of sexual dysfunction. The diagnosis of dyspareunia is used when intercourse causes pain to the woman. The pain felt during intercourse can be: primary and secondary, complete and situation-dependent – explains Kriszta Round is a sexual therapist.

  1. We can talk about primary pain if intercourse hurts every time since the beginning of sexual life.
  2. The pain is secondary if you attack after a short or long period of undisturbed intercourse.
  3. By total pain we mean that the presence of the penis hurts from the beginning to the end of intercourse.
  4. The situation-dependent pain is caused by a certain body position or the inexperience of the new partner.

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Dyspareunia can also be grouped according to the localization of the onset of pain. Thus, we can distinguish two groups:

-a superficial (observed around the vaginal entrance), and
-deep dyspareunia (occurring in the vagina during deep penetration).

Physical causes of painful intercourse include, but are not limited to, vaginal stenosis, vaginal cystitis, endometriosis, sexually transmitted diseases, cervical wound, or vaginal wall atrophy due to a lack of estrogen at varying ages.

Spiritual reasons include:

– previous sexual abuse,
– relationship conflict (eg poor or inadequate communication between peers),
– guilt over sex life,
– fear of pregnancy,
– condemning opinion of parents about sex,
– the foreplay is not correct,
– vaginal dryness,
– problems related to a specific partner (This is called partner-specific dyspareunia, when the pain does not always occur only when working with a certain partner or partners.)

The role of pain sensation is to signal danger, to defend, and to avoid the stimulus that causes pain after multiple associations. If a man takes into account a woman’s feeling of pain following a penis penetration, she may regret the intention to have sexual intercourse for years, unfortunately, misunderstood “tenderness” (mostly weakness). Some people visit a doctor when they want a child after 6 to 10 years of unsuccessful attempts.

The feeling of pain may be triggered by a tension stimulus in the penis that reaches the hymen or vagina, and may later occur as a conditional stimulus. Feelings of pain may occur during foreplay, during communication, and may persist for a longer or shorter period of time thereafter. The pain felt just below the insertion of the penis serves the same purpose as the cessation of wetting: the unconscious protest of the loss of the clitoral (clitoral) orgasm.

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Frequent, chronic residual diffuse abdominal pain may be signs of sexual intercourse for the physician. This symptom is most common in women who have regular sex in marriage. A patient with such symptoms should ask some well-directed tactful questions about the onset of pain. It usually turns out very quickly that you always have pain, but mostly during marriage. Most people also say that the husband is “so good”, “understanding”, “patient”. These reports show that the feeling of pain is very “suitable” for avoiding unwanted sexual intercourse. The husband has respect for his “sick” wife, and does not even think that this “some kind of gynecological disease” is a consequence or an accompanying phenomenon of an inappropriate sex life. It is characteristic of these relationships that the man is usually of a weak character, an easily rejected type, or does not care about the satisfaction of his wife due to inexperience or possibly selfishness.

Feelings of pain may also occur as a result of abdominal congestion or stagnation, usually as a result of increased, unresolved arousal, anorgasmia. With the repeated, constant appearance of any problem, the feeling of pain is conditioned, and it works as a conditional reflex even if the “acute danger”, the act is not “threatening”. Painful intercourse should not be confused with vaginismus, which is a spasmodic contraction of the muscles around the vagina that makes penetration impossible in a significant number of cases. It is very important that if you experience any discomfort, from mild discomfort to very severe pain (possibly bleeding), be sure to see a gynecologist! In the event that the specialist does not diagnose any disease, please only seek the help of a sex therapist.

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Source: Napidoktor by napidoktor.hu.

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