Is it legal to change your sex life during pregnancy and after childbirth? Physical and hormonal changes, various interventions are likely to affect you from time to time, but what happens when there is no longer a physical barrier to sex?
The birth of a child often burdens couples. Many different levels of change are happening at the same time, but the most basic is that the couple are starting to function as mothers and fathers. At the same time, they face new tasks, responsibilities, and a fundamentally changed daily routine. These changes, or even the fight against them, often leave a mark on sex life (also), reports Egy.hu.
It may be that the situations that naturally developed spontaneously from then, from which a system that satisfies everyone has developed, are now becoming a task. It is almost a duty to make love. It’s going to be something that needs to be done consciously because it sure doesn’t come naturally. However, there are many reasons for this.
The effect of pregnancy on sex
Change does not begin with the birth of a child. Questions and doubts about sexual life can appear already during pregnancy. For many, the first trimester is a time of malaise, when morning sickness often lasts until the next morning and then begins again. In this case, the woman may not feel ready to be together, consider herself unattractive, or just not in a physical condition to even think about sex.
Later, with the constant change in the hormonal situation, libido can also go on a roller coaster ride: one particularly desires sex, while another’s desire decreases. This cannot be predicted in advance, but if it does, it must be adapted to the situation. As the tummy grows, new challenges come. Even sticking to the physical aspects can make it more difficult to achieve coexistence, but changes can occur at a deeper level. Possible weight gain, increasing body size can form barriers in a woman, raising doubts about her physical attraction. Although most of the time we see in a healthy relationship that a man sees his partner just as beautiful, different, difficult thoughts may come to the surface. The fear of paternity, or even the mere fact that a third party (who, moreover, their own child) is there among them during an act, can act as a psychological obstacle. It is also possible that a father has an experience with a man during childbirth or is faced with a spectacle that makes him overly cautious. No two people are alike, so we can never know how our partner or ourselves will react to an unprecedented situation.
Mom and dad will be attractive adult women and men
When the baby is already there, demanding full-day care at first, sex is often not a top priority. Keeping a small person alive — especially if they are a first-time child — can be very stressful, a lot of anxious, or even awkward. Because you don’t have the right routine yet, some tasks can take more time and energy, can lead to more worries, which doesn’t help you leave the mother role.
In theory, many people know how important it is to separate the female-male and mother-father roles, but in practice this is often very difficult to achieve. After functioning as a mother all day, it is difficult to feel like an attractive adult woman immediately after the baby is laid. At all, they grow to feel it. We may not be as well-groomed as we would like, because we didn’t have time to wash our hair, for example, or we could just have a hearty bath, because feeding the baby all left a mark on our clothes and skin. These all make switching difficult.
Returning from work as a man, we drop into the role of a father, which is also no small change. We jump from communication at work to squealing, and soon after that we have to become an attractive man with another sudden change. The task is not easy, especially since men are usually able to spend less time with their children and get the necessary routine more slowly, so their role as a father may require extra concentration. In spite of telling men that “they are always on their minds” or “they can have sex at any time,” this is often not the case, contrary to stereotypes. Many people need romance, attunement, foreplay as well.
Timed coexistence can be the solution
There are also couples where sexual intercourse is equally important to both parties. We would think that everything is cloudless with them. However, the situation is not so simple, as it is still the child who takes an active role in the management of everyday life. In an ideal world, two parties with the same libido would have a child who is calm, a good eater, and sleeps through the night from the age of a few weeks. However, this coexistence is given to only a small percentage of families. So if we want coexistence to happen, it may have to be timed. If we know that our child falls asleep at 8 in the evening and usually wakes up every 2 hours, it is worth planning the evening so that the cohabitation fits in any way. Dishwashing, packing and the next part of our favorite series can be waiting for you to have sex first.
And if you have any resentment about the timing of spontaneous coexistence, let’s calm ourselves down with three thoughts:
- so at least we will definitely have time for it, we don’t have to interrupt it
- at that time, we also dated dating during dating, why not do that too?
- it doesn’t always have to be this way from now on. However, as a workaround, it may be worth trying.
If we don’t feel comfortable, it’s still worth giving her a chance, keeping in mind that this can be a temporary compromise that helps maintain intimacy in the relationship. And that’s especially important because that particular kid will grow up sooner or later, and then we’ll stay there alone again. It doesn’t hurt to know what to do with each other!
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Source: Napidoktor by napidoktor.hu.
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