Anyone who already has some experience with online dating knows it well: “white lies” find fertile ground on dating apps. To analyze the phenomenon is Once, a pioneer app for slow dating. The result? 76% of singles surveyed confessed to having told “little lies” within dating apps and 70% said they were victims of petty deceptions by other users.
The most common “white lies”
Overall, one in four users (24%) said they resorted to little lies to make them more attractive to the person they were meeting. But what are the issues on which Italian singles lie the most? In the first place, for 44% of the interviewees, lies mainly concern small character defects, for this reason they prefer to omit being lazy, disordered or chronic laggards. Following, in second place (14.9%), the “white lies” concern interests, for example many singles pretend to be interested in a particular TV series or a musical group just to meet the tastes of the last match. In third place (14.5%) we find lifestyle lies, such as being smokers or not inclined to physical activity. Not only that, one in ten singles (10%) even go as far as lying about their work, while only 6% say they have put out dated or highly modified photos to be more attractive.
But what makes people lie about dating apps or when they meet a new person? “Have you ever seen someone look in the mirror and think no one sees them? We pose, we make funny expressions. In short, we always look for the image of ourselves in which we appreciate ourselves the mostHe observes Fabienne Kraemer, French psychologist and relationship expert, who analyzed the research data. “The same goes for dating apps and social networks in general. We all have a more or less distorted image of ourselves, because in the end the one who sees us less as we are in everyday life is us! Others know our looks, our faces and their expressions, but we ourselves have only a fictional image of who we really are. In a way, we cheat with our image all the time».
Kittenfishing: look better than you are
65% of Italian singles interviewed said they had been deceived by fake photos or that did not correspond to the truth. The phenomenon also has a specific name: kittenfishing. It could be defined as the soft version of another neologism, catfishing, which defines a deceptive activity on social networks and which involves the creation and use of an account with a false identity. The kittenfishing (term that comes from “kitten” which means “kitty” and “fishing” which metaphorically stands for “hunting”) occurs when you use a photo from a few years ago or heavily modified to look better. Put simply, the photos are of the person sending them, but they are by no means realistic.
In detail, 35% happened to come into contact with users who had put photos of themselves, but now too old or no longer faithful to reality, while one in three users (32%) was deceived by highly photos modified to be more attractive. For this reason, it is not surprising that just under half of Italian singles (48%) confess to trusting people they met online only after having met their match in person.
«The kittenfishing phenomenon was born for a specific reason: on most dating apps, the competition is so fierce that you need to embellish reality to stand out. The concept behind Once is exactly the opposite and with only one match per day no user has to struggle to receive that particular attention or elbow the other users.“, he claims Clémentine Lalande, CEO of Once. «Our slow dating philosophy allows you to talk to only one person at a time, which gives you the opportunity to question their profile and learn more about who they really are. We know that nearly half of dingles feel the need to lie about other dating apps, so our mission is to create a community where every single person feels completely comfortable just being themselves.».
So what are the signs that can help us understand if the person on the other side of the screen is authentic? “The image you see of yourself online is always a bit distortedContinues the Kraemer. «We must therefore look for the true lies, those that are made voluntarily. My advice is to make it clear immediately that it is always better to know the reality of things and that you will not forgive any lies. For example, you can ask a few more questions to understand when the profile photos were taken, what story they can tell us. The more photos there are, the closer you get to a real idea of the other person. Few photos are always a sign of uncertainty and leave the imagination open to doubts, always a little doubtful. For this it is always better to put more photos in very different situations to be seen more authentic».
Source: RSS DiariodelWeb.it Trend by www.diariodelweb.it.
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