November 8, 1917. Baby from Pitra did not stand …


Comrades! Equally 104 years ago, the women of the Petrograd Women’s Battalion could not withstand the pressure of the proletarian spearhead of progress. On November 8, at 2:00 am, the Winter Palace collapsed. For the people of progress, a new era has begun, the construction of a new just world has begun. The world of communist democracy and universal prosperity.

Allow me, comrades, that on this solemn day I wish you further success in building a new order and creating a new man. A modern man, today without a pointed hat with a red star.

Comrades! We know that it is not difficult to carry out a revolution, it is a piece of cake. Well, maybe I did not express myself fortunately: where the revolution triumphs, usually butter becomes a rarity, and a roll remains a distant memory. But it is not a difficult matter, there must be a combination of historical circumstances, some war, economic or imaginary crisis or a real lack of civil liberties and a revolution is ready. The problem begins later, because the man on behalf of whom the revolution is being made and for whom he strives for a bright future is such an ungrateful animal that he demands additionally some housing, food, and some clothes … There is no more. Therefore, sooner or later all revolutions end in the same way, the status quo before the revolution is restored.

In order to prevent this from happening, the organizers and beneficiaries of the revolution start building a new man immediately after the victory. Although the base of the revolution is the ignorant, ignorant mob, the organizers of the revolution are intelligent people, with intelligence – sometimes – devilish. An example of how to build a new man was already given by the French Revolution, of course, the achievements of French revolutionaries in this field, compared to what the Bolshevik Revolution gave us over a hundred years later, is a little fun. For what is this pretentious revolutionary calendar with some Brumaire, Nivôse, Pluviôse to denote the months, or bizarrely to denote individual days of the month as: apple, fig, chicory or turkey? no sense. Or even more pretentious addressing the king to “Citizen Capet”? Childishness. Comrades! The achievements of the Bolsheviks in building a new man are incomparably greater.

But how to build a new man? A man who will believe in an undisturbed way that he lives in the best of worlds. The first thing to do is kill memory, and in those days, memory was hidden in books. Therefore, as early as 1917, the People’s Commissariat of Education ordered the confiscation of books from private libraries with over 500 volumes. The results seem unsatisfactory, because in September 1919 Lenin orders the Chekists to destroy all books which, in their opinion, contain content hostile to the revolution. They caught fire, so piles of books like the Land of the Soviets wide and long, books were burned in exactly the same way as the Germans later burned them on the Opera Square in Berlin. But who remembers today that the communists were burning books? After all, they were fighting illiteracy. In 1929, the circulation of the book is completely nationalized, and in 1935 Stalin orders the creation of forbidden library departments, out of those still missing books. Memory is killed.

The creation of a new man continues without interruption. Completely new “red weddings” are introduced in Orthodox Russia, a new funeral ceremony is introduced according to the revolutionary rite. There is quite a lot of freedom of manners, but soon. Puritan Georgian will take care of it. Despite all these changes, people still cultivate the old holidays, it is difficult to control this sphere. However, this was also dealt with by placing revolutionary holidays in the vicinity of church holidays, and holidays of all saints of the Bolshevik revolution. Children are born, a new, revolutionary generation is growing, untouched by old times. Time and this problem have been solved.

So it introduces a revolutionary authority a new ceremony of baptism, a new extraordinary, revolutionary baptismo called “October”, isn’t it beautiful? Children baptized in this way cannot be called any other than “October” (Ребята октбрята), is it even more beautiful? moving. But what if the October children continue to be called: Saszka, Fiedia, Tania or Waniusza … and this was also changed. There are some pretty wonderful names, unknown so far. Moscow yards are beginning to be populated by small toddlers named: Melor (Marx, Engels, Lenin, Oktyabrskaya Riewolucja) or the shorter Rewmir (Rewoliucja, Mir). And the biggest neighborhood rogue named Milicja (it’s not a joke) fights with a boy named Władlen (Vladimir Lenin). Some older boys named Kombajn, Drezyna and Ocean together with Gławspirt (Gławspirt – spirit monopoly) drink cheap wine at the gate. Everything is watched by Wolfram with Molybdenum, who have made an appointment with their classmates, Electrification and Barricade. The fact that Barykada agreed to come on a date is a great success for Molibden, because Barykada has the opinion of the most difficult girl in the class. Noblesse oblige one would like to write, unfortunately it was not the “oblige” times, let alone “noblesse”. Electrification is less puritanical, she knows that this evening it will make Wolfram white.


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