Italy is a republic founded on the Var

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From 10pm and 2pm on January 19, 2021, Italy is a republic founded on the Var. Forget the first article of the Constitution, which cited work: now there is little, it has been replaced by citizenship income, it is more a right what a duty.

No, the new frontier of democracy is the Video Assistant Referee: video assistant referee, therefore male, wrong to say “the Var”. The President of the Senate Elisabetta Casellati last night asked her Quaestors to review the filming of the session after closing the vote on trust in the Conte government. And they established that senators Lello Ciampolillo (former grillino) and Riccardo Nencini (socialist) could vote, because they had asked by raising their hand a few seconds before the deadline.

Screams of protest, of course, just like in stadiums. This time the enraged fans were the center-right ones, as the two senators voted for Conte, bringing his meager booty to 156.

The pair of ‘builders’ (or turncoats, for their opponents) waited for two ‘calls’ (the appeals in alphabetical order) before expressing their choice. “The PSI secretariat meeting ended late,” Nencini justified. Yet they had had plenty of time to decide, so the delay is suspicious. Did they make the precious ones? Exhibitionism? Embarrassed by their transition from the opposition to the majority, commonly referred to as ‘leap of the quail’?

The chronicles from Byzantium record that, in any case, the procedural innovation introduced by Casellati was not pro domo her, given that she is center-right. But let’s expect endless bickering from now on: lazy and careless parliamentarians will ask for the Var every time they linger at the bar.

It is not the first time that slow motion has entered the classroom. Poor Senator Barani (also a socialist) had his career cut short in 2015 when the terrible grillina Taverna lashed out at him, accusing him of having mimed an oral report with hand and mouth in comment on an intervention by his colleague Lezzi.

Process, replay, filthy suspended and not reappointed.

Except that in the heat the charming Taverna made a mistake: he repeated the gesture to convince the then president Grasso, more amused than stunned, to open the procedure. So today, in that immense Var that is the network, the video of the complainant is more easily found than that of the reprobate.

In reality, slow motion is the worst enemy of politicians, because it nails them to their past. Near or far: Veltroni who announces to move to Africa, Renzi who promises to leave politics if he loses the referendum, the grillino who swears to reduce his salary to 2500 euros, the Po Communist Salvini, the fascist hobbit Meloni.

Before the cameras there were photographers who earned their living by lurking for hours and hours in the press gallery for the sole purpose of capturing embarrassing moments: the ‘pianists’ who secretly voted for the absent neighbor, the sleeping parliamentarian, Jotti with her finger in the nose. Ambushes then amplified by Striscia la Notizia, with Golden Tapir to the victim.

In fact, in our new republic founded on the Var, we can only thank the cameras. Which, it is true, torment us with speed cameras. But, installed by the millions on every street, they have allowed an immeasurable leap forward in the statistics on resolved cases, captured criminals, identified hijackers. Up to the exhibitionist rapists like Genovese, who themselves give evidence to the investigators with small films to distribute to friends.

And when we use the Var also between husband and wife, no Ciampolillo will get away with it: we will annihilate the guilty spouse with a simple rewind, making him resent or revise the stupidity said an hour, a day, a month before.


Source: Huffington Post Italy Athena2 by www.huffingtonpost.it.

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